QPHY 101DEPT. OF APPLIED MOMENTUM
Principles of Questro Physics
Study why objects at rest remain on the couch—and the three Laws of SideQuests that can get them moving.
FOUNDATION REQUIREMENT
REAL LIFE
IAB
ACCREDITED
EST. 1998-ISH
STATUS: ENROLLMENT NOW OPEN
CoolSideQuests
Institute of
Applied Boredom
IAB = Institute of Applied Boredom = “I Am Bored.”
DECLARE YOUR MAJOR:
Sidequestronics
B.S.Q. — Bachelor of Sidequestronics
A degree in getting off your phone and doing stuff.
No tuition. No homework. Questionable career prospects.
START MY DEGREEWelcome, prospective student. Previous academic achievement not required.
2026–1998-ISH ACADEMIC CATALOGUE
Choose a highly practical field of study.
A small sample from the Institute. Full course registration and credits are still under questionable development.
COURSE_SEARCH.DAT5 RECORDS FOUND
QSTR 201QUESTRONOMY
Introduction to Questronomy
A practical survey of choosing, attempting, and occasionally finishing a real-life quest.
FIELD WORK INCLUDEDOUTS 101FACULTY OF TOUCHING GRASS
Introduction to Going Outside
Foundational study in closing the app, locating a door, and entering the wider campus.
NO PREREQUISITESSPON 220SPONTANEITY SCIENCES
Applied Spontaneity
Act on a decent idea before planning turns it into something you will definitely do next week.
LAB: UNSCHEDULEDDSCR 301DOOMSCROLL INTERRUPTION SCIENCES
Advanced Doomscroll Avoidance
Upper-level methods for escaping one more post, one more video, and one more hour.
SEAT TIME: TOO MUCHREQUIRED READING // QPHY 101
The Laws of SideQuests
- Objects in motion stay in motion unless overcome by an external force such as a phone, couch, snacks, or “I’ll do it later.”
- The difficulty of starting a quest is inversely proportional to how long you think about starting it.
- For every boring afternoon, there is an equal and opposite SideQuest.
THE FUTURE ACADEMIC PATH
Your suspiciously legitimate degree plan
01Do a SideQuestFIELD ASSIGNMENT
→
02Earn creditsACADEMIC-ISH
→
03Complete coursesDEGREE PROGRESS
→
04GraduatePRINTABLE B.S.Q.
This progression system is the plan, not a live feature yet. Today, enrollment saves your seat and tells us whether the Institute should become real-er.
ADMISSIONS OFFICE
Enroll in IAB
Declare a major in Sidequestronics. We’ll save your seat and email you when field assignments, credits, and degree progress are ready to test.
- No tuition.
- No homework.
- One potentially useful email later.