BOREDOM EMERGENCY SERVICES
OPERATION: BOREDOM
PHONectomy
An emergency extraction for patients whose phone has become medically indistinguishable from their hand.
LIVE // PATIENT_01
72 BPM STABLE-ISH
PROCEDURE LOG:000%
*** PHONE-HAND BOND CONFIRMED.
PATIENT REMAINS FIRMLY ATTACHED.
LIVE FEED // CAM_01 // PIXEL RESOLUTION: MEDICALLY ADEQUATE
DISCHARGE SUMMARY // CONDITION: IMPROVING
PHONectomy SUCCESSFUL
The phone has been separated from the hand. Thumb mobility is expected to return within minutes.
POST-OP INSTRUCTIONS
Patient must remain off the phone for at least ONE SIDE QUEST.
Fresh air, curiosity, mild nonsense, and use of both hands are strongly encouraged.
Rx
BOREDOM EMERGENCY SERVICESOFF-SCREEN PRESCRIPTION
CASE 0000 // TAKE ONCE, IMMEDIATELY
Quest loading...
DOCTOR'S NOTE: close this device and begin before the scrolling reflex returns.
PRESCRIPTION ACCEPTED. YOU MAY NOW CLOSE THIS DEVICE.
Prescription database unavailable. Open the quest directory →