THE DAILY QUEST

A local man entered a grocery store Thursday afternoon carrying $50 and what he described as "a pretty short list."

He emerged twenty minutes later with two tomatoes, a loaf of bread and a receipt he has since shown to several neighbours.

"I didn't even buy anything good," he said.

The man, who asked not to be identified because he intends to shop there again, said he spent several minutes comparing the prices of cereal before abandoning the idea altogether.

"They're charging more for less cereal. I don't understand how that works."

A spokesperson for the breakfast food industry offered a different perspective.

"We haven't reduced the amount of cereal. We've increased the amount of box."

The man returned to the store later that evening to purchase a carton of eggs.

A financing application is pending.

After seven years, a local man has finally finished the novel that has occupied his bedside table since the summer of 2019.

The book had spent much of that time beneath a lamp, several receipts and a television remote.

"I just kept turning the pages," he explained. "Eventually there weren't any left."

His wife confirmed that the achievement had been a long time coming.

"He's been saying he's almost finished since 2021. We stopped asking."

Family members briefly considered organizing a celebration, but decided against it after the man announced that he might start another book.

"We don't want to put pressure on him," his wife said.

The local library has congratulated him and requested the return of fourteen other books.

He says he'll get around to it.